Fierce Killer of Snakes

In appreciation for the warm weather, we had our first Grill Meal of the season Saturday evening. Few warm weather activities are better than sitting on the front porch while supper cooks over a fire. Even Ella likes the fire. We did learn that the experience can be enhanced with the killing of a snake.

Yes, the snakes were also out enjoying the warm weather. Thanks to Jewel E. Cat, we had live entertainment for our porch sitting. Just as the evening was fading into dusk, I saw her trotting over to the neighbor’s flower bed, where she regularly provides extermination services. A few minutes later, she returned home with a gift for us. I’m sure it was an expression of, “Happy Spring! I’m glad to have you playing outside again. Oh, and here’s a snake for your enjoyment!”

It was a small snake – maybe a foot long and half the width of my pinkie finger. Not a tiny baby, but not big enough to discern what kind either. It was coiled up while she was carrying it and she dropped it belly up. Then it moved. She stood guard while Dave ran for the shovel.

The scene that followed has me erupting into a fit of giggles as I write this. As background, you should know that to say that Dave is scared of snakes is a grossly, negligent understatement of his true feelings. This is a man who left me in his dust when I told him I’d just heard a rattlesnake in our yard in Gardendale. I didn’t even get the words out of my mouth and he was no where to be found. The snapping of twigs and rustling of leaves strikes fear in his heart.

Back to Saturday evening. Intending to chop the snake in half, Dave swung the blade of the shovel in a great downward chop! He missed. The snake began slithering for his life, Jewel fled the area for fear of the shovel, and Dave chopped and chopped until sparks were flying up from the ground and there were white marks all over the pavement. The snake was still moving. Dave adopted a new approached. He lifted the shovel over his head and swung it with all his might, hitting the snake with the flat, backside of the shovel again and again. The noise was incredible! Ella’s eyes were huge and her arm was locked around mine in a death grip. The animals were scattered and unnerved. I’m not sure what the snake looked like at this point because Dave immediately started grinding the flat side of the shovel back and forth over it. When he finished, chest heaving and breath puffing, he pronounced, “I think it’s dead.”

As I am right now, I was doubled over with laughter. I went inside, laughing all the way, to turn on the flood lights so we could examine the snake to find out what kind it was. Wouldn’t you know we couldn’t tell?

He’s come a long way since that day in Gardendale. I only wish now that I had taken a picture of him proudly holding his shovel full of snake pulp so you could all celebrate his triumph over one of God’s more bone-chilling creatures.